Browns train has jumped the track
I always thought it was pretty cool that Berea had all those train tracks – and even an old depot – in their city. Anyone familiar with the area knows Berea has long played an important part in the history of the locomotive; in fact many "trainwatchers" still flock to Berea on a regular basis to witness the many trains which still frequently pass through the city. I also always thought it pretty impressive that Berea had never witnessed a serious train wreck in more than 150 years of choo-chooing (that’s technical train talk; try to keep up, please).
Just as those pleasant feelings were cascading through my body, much like a pass from – well, just about anyone – cascades through the hands of Greg Little, it hit me: Berea HAS had a train wreck. Still does, in fact. Should you want to witness one first-hand, hit the Browns training camp about mid-July, and hang around for six weeks or so, and you will have train wrecks up to your eyeballs. It’s otherwise known as NFL football, Cleveland style.
One of the great mysteries of life has to be the Cleveland Browns. They’re not just a franchise which is having a little run of bad luck, kids. Au contraire, mon ami. They stink. We talk about ‘em, we write about ‘em, we read about ‘em. It’s like a train wreck that is so horrific that we know we shouldn’t look, but we do anyway. Much like the garbage some writers churn out every two weeks. You know you shouldn’t read – you’re way better than that – but you come back for more, anyway. (Thanks, by the way – although you’re lucky you haven’t damaged your retinas).
But before I get sidetracked (note the clever placement of a railroad reference) further, back to the Browns. Jimmy Haslam just sent a letter to season ticket holders (which was probably sent with insufficient postage) imploring them to be patient just a tad longer.
Patient? Why would Browns fans NOT be patient, Jimmy? Heck, you always say the organization is committed to “getting it right” because that’s what Browns fans deserve. I doubt anyone has noticed that a year ago you said you were sure – after an extensive search -- that Rob Chudzinski was “the right guy.” Refresh my memory: How’d that work out?
Besides, what do you care, anyway? You’re about to have the Sin Tax finance a boxcar-load (clever, huh?) of improvements to Browns Stadium in spite of 15 years of incredible ineptitude. Record-breaking ineptitude, in fact.
The sad thing is that most communities can’t pass a school levy to save their lives, but we’re more than willing to light up and drink up, so we can watch Greg Little drop passes on an even bigger screen. Sweet. And then, when the Browns actually get good, you’ll reward their loyalty by jacking up the ticket prices.
Will I hop on (support) the Sin Tax Express when it chugs into town in May?
Sorry Jimmy, that train has left the station.
Lifelong Westlake resident who dabbles in writing whenever the real world permits. My forte is humor and horror...What a combo!