Wells vs. Welles

Author H.G. Wells and actor Oson Wells.

When two bigger-than-life personalities cross paths something interesting is bound to happen.

On Oct. 28, 1940, KTSA radio in San Antonio, Texas, arranged for an on-air meeting between a 74-year-old H.G. Wells, commonly referred to as the father of science fiction, and Orson Welles, a 25-year-old stage actor that had become rather famous two years earlier when he preformed a radio adaptation of "War of the Worlds" by H.G. Wells which was originally published in 1897 in serialized form in Pearson's Magazine in the UK and Cosmopolitan in the U.S.

Although their age and career paths were quite different, one thing they shared was the gift of understatement. Presented here are quotes from both men. See if you can guess who said what. The answers are below. 

1. Advertising is legalized lying. 

2. In politics, strangely enough, the best way to play your cards is to lay them face upwards on the table.  

3. I started at the top and worked my way down. 

4. History is a race between education and catastrophe.

5. My doctor told me to stop having intimate dinners for four. Unless there are three other people. 

6. The past is but the past of a beginning. 

7. After people have repeated a phrase a great number of times, they begin to realize it has meaning and may even be true. 

8. I have an unfortunate personality. 

9. I don't say we all ought to misbehave, but we ought to look as if we could.

10. Sailors ought never to go to church. They ought to go to hell, where it is much more comfortable.

11. I hate television. I hate it as much as peanuts. But I can't stop eating peanuts. 

12. Our true nationality is mankind.

13. Everything bad that has ever happened to me has been caused by agents or lawyers. 

14. What really matters is what you do with what you have. 

15. Living in the lap of luxury isn't bad except that you never know when luxury is going to stand up. 

16. I have always been more interested in experiment, than in accomplishment. 

17. If I ever own a restaurant, I will never allow the waiters to ask if the diners like their dishes. Particularly when they're talking.

18. The uglier a man's legs are, the better he plays golf - it's almost a law.

19. Some people bear three kinds of trouble - the ones they've had, the ones they have, and the ones they expect to have.

20. Only very intelligent people don't wish they were in politics, and I'm dumb enough to want to be in there. 

ANSWER KEY

H.G Wells: 1, 2, 4, 6, 7, 10, 12, 14, 18, 19

Orson Wells: 3, 5, 8, 9, 11, 13, 15, 16, 17, 20

See "War of the Worlds: The Panic Broadcast" by Joe Landry and experience a bit of history for yourself. Tickets available at www.BayTheater.org or by calling 440-847-8494. Performances are at 8:00 p.m. Fridays and Saturdays, Oct. 19, 20, 26 and 27. A single matinee performance is scheduled for 3:00 p.m. Sunday, Oct. 28.

General admission tickets are $12 for adults; $10 for seniors and students.