Now, THIS is serious

Okay, so I heard the NBA was canceling their season because one of their players tested positive for everyone’s new best enemy, the coronavirus.

So, the biggie here is …? The Cavs canceled a few games at the tail end of their season, and, let’s be honest: given the quality of play from the Cavs this year, wasn’t their season actually over before Christmas?

At least they didn’t take my baseball from me. After all, the Tribe opener is only a couple of weeks awa…WHAT? Say it ain’t so, MLB! No baseball until – in all likelihood – May at best? You’re telling me no Frankie? No Clev? No Beibs? Now you have my attention.

What to do, what to do … Think, Jeff, think. You can do it; I’m pretty sure you’ve had to think before (on occasion, anyway). What other sports could you become interested in?

Aha! How about cricket? You use a bat and a ball (two qualities of baseball, BTW), and it’s big with the Aussies. (Seriously, how can you not love that Australian accent, mate?) But what I want to know is how they use the crickets … as bait maybe? Now that I think about it, my ears are still ringing from those noisy rascals in our yard last fall. I guess I’ll pass on cricket, at least until they get the, ahem, “bugs” out.

Here we go … how about cycling? That’s something that might be fun to watch. Hey, if I watch a race, record it, and watch again, wouldn’t that be recycling? So, I’m sitting on the couch AND helping the environment at the same time, yes? Genius.

What else? How about – wait for it – sumo wrestling?! In fact, I am probably only a couple of cheesecakes away from the idea transitioning from “spectator” to “participation” sport! Coaching? I don’t need no stinking coaching, as long as I bring my trainer Sara Lee, baby. Some might think the training regimen would be difficult, but I’m pretty sure it would be a piece of cake. Ouch.

There must be something else. I’ve got it! Stop the presses, Tara! The answer is … fencing! It sounds like fun, but then again, digging all those deep holes for the posts might become a bit boring. And, with all the choices regarding types of fencing, and having to make the decision of which is best for us, I’m not sure I’m qualified to (apologizing in advance for this one) “pickit.” (Yes, it’s best I move on).

Of course, if I simply want to get involved in contact sports, all I need to do is enter a grocery store and announce that I have the last case of hand sanitizer. Being trampled by a stampede isn’t pretty, but it’s certain to toughen you up.

Seriously folks, we have our work cut out for us for the next several months, minimum. My intent here is not to dismiss a serious situation, but to remind everyone that maintaining our sense of humor despite our challenges will help us face the issues ahead.

Keep your focus, laugh when you can, and we’ll get through this together. When you are laughing, you are not stressing, and stress eats away at your immune system. Don’t allow that to happen.

Deal?

Jeff Bing

Lifelong Westlake resident who dabbles in writing whenever the real world permits. My forte is humor and horror...What a combo!

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Volume 12, Issue 6, Posted 9:41 AM, 03.17.2020