The Smell of Odor

Well, just the other morning, I went out for a jog,
Not in the best of shape, I sat down on a log.
A little exercise was all I was contemplatin'.
Never thought at 5 a.m. I'd engage in conversatin'.

Now it is important to note, that the path I do take,
Is rather remote – and acquaintances – so few do I make.
But do you ever get the feeling, that something lies ahead,
Whether it's just a premonition – or something more instead?

But make no mistake, there was something in the air,
Man, that smell was ripe, had to leave my make-shift chair.
Resumed my morning jog, a little quicker than I'd planned,
And believe me when I say, the smell I could not stand.

As I peered straight ahead, in the early morning light,
I saw a tiny mammal, black with stripes of white.
Seriously thinking "detour," I veered over to the left,
Yet he stayed right in front, with counter-moves just as deft.

I thought, "What's up with this dude – the arrogant little punk,
Why on earth am I being forced to play 'chicken' with a skunk?"
Now, I know you must be thinking that this story cannot be,
But then the little stinker started talking to me!

He said, "Now please don't be offended, but really there's no doubt,
That the guys and I'd be grateful, if you would choose another route.
I'll try to keep this short, and get right to the point,
But when you run on through here, you're stinking up the joint!"

How dare that little vermin, attacking me in that way,
I almost always take a shower – did so just the other day!
But when I stopped to argue, I must admit there was a smell,
Which emanated from my armpits, so strong I almost fell.

Suddenly, that jogging path held few redeeming features,
For I'd just been called "stinky" by the most odoriferous of creatures.
And, even though the whole experience was most likely a mirage,
I went out and bought a treadmill, and now jog in the garage!

Jeff Bing

Lifelong Westlake resident who dabbles in writing whenever the real world permits. My forte is humor and horror...What a combo!

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Volume 5, Issue 18, Posted 10:42 AM, 09.04.2013