Happy as a clam!

Let’s hand it to Mother Nature: 2015’s transition from late summer into early fall afforded Westlakers and Bayites plenty of dazzling days with above-average temperatures and cool, crisp nights. What better conditions for walking in area parks, taking scenic bike rides, or exploring the locally grown bounty at area grocers and farmers’ markets!

When it comes to traditional autumn activities, clambakes bring a taste of the East Coast to the Westshore. For anyone thinking of hosting a clambake who is not sure where to start, rest easy. Local purveyors are prepared to provide all that’s needed! Otherwise, there’s no shortage of clambakes staged by local groups, restaurants, and homeowner associations. (If, however, you’re the one who will be picking up the tab, be ready to dish out some serious clams!)

While it can safely be assumed that not all local residents clamor for clams, who can crab about the clambake’s ability to consistently capture autumn’s allure? (Besides the ambiance, much like tailgating, clambakes are a good setting for relaxing and letting off some steam.)

You may be as happy as a clam for the chance to gather with friends and family to share a fabulous fall evening al fresco. Once the sun has dipped below the horizon, where else but at a clambake would you savor the singular sensation of sipping a simmering cup of stock to ward off the early evening’s sudden chill? (Just hope that too many cooks won’t spoil the broth!)

Has feeling as happy as a clam ever left you wondering what could possibly make a clam happy?

The saying’s unabridged version, “as happy as a clam in high tide” serves to correct our course. Since clams are harvested during low tide, a clam in high tide is almost as elated as the presidentially pardoned Thanksgiving turkey (but that’s next month’s news!).

Here’s a word of caution about a certain category of clambake: the company outing. It could be a game-changer when you’re somebody’s guest and meeting everyone for the first time.

To avoid putting your foot in your mouth, you could clam up, but the silent treatment won’t impress others at all. (Nor should you try to overcompensate by rattling off corny jokes based on material in this article!)

You might also want to skirt any discussion of politics, which can be a real hot potato, but what you could do instead is butter up the boss by complimenting him or her on the success of the occasion! After all, you’re smart enough to know on which side the bread is buttered!  

Although you may do well to heed these words to the wise, there’s no need to chicken out! Given the chance, steak, er, stake things out first so you don’t have to bury your head in the sand (sorry, that’s an ostrich). If the weather permits, make sure to don your clam-diggers while whistling along to “Don’t Worry, Be Happy” (as a clam!).

Read More on Humor
Volume 7, Issue 19, Posted 8:51 AM, 10.06.2015