What in the Snell is Matt talking about?

It’s been a weird year so far. Now, that shouldn’t come as a profound revelation to anyone out there who’s still remotely lucid (unless you’ve been getting carried away with the hand sanitizer or you made your facemask out of paper-mâché), but I learned a long time ago to never assume anything.

With that thought in mind, I, like most of you out there, revised my perspective on 2020 a couple of months back when that intrusive, absolutely uninvited party crasher (aka coronavirus – aka COVID-19 – aka the opposite of a Happy Meal) dropped in for a visit. And, just like the unemployed 40-year-old who still resides in Mom and Pop’s basement, we have no idea how much longer it will be before he packs up and leaves – provided he ever chooses to do so.

Like I was saying, I severely ratcheted back my plans for 2020. No African safaris. No guest appearances on "Jeopardy." No Nobel Peace Prize(s). No mastering the hula-hoop. Which stinks, because I had my sights set on all of them, but especially the hula-hoop.

And even the stuff that we used to take for granted, like visiting our kids and grandkids? Nope. We could be carriers and infect them. They could be carriers and infect us (which, from my perspective, would be much worse). Vacations? Cancelled. Amusement parks? Forget it. My wife and I have played Scrabble so many times now the only word I want to spell is “I Quit.” (Okay, okay, it’s two words but I was making a point. Humor me.) The highlight of my day now is walking outside to get the paper and geez, that’s only 4 days a week now. The humanity.

But I had one thing to get me through this. The one thing that’s been part of my life as long as I can remember. It’s been there for me no matter how high the peaks or how low the valleys of my life. What might that be, you ask?

Baseball. Baseball has been my favorite sport, as I said earlier, since the beginning of time (well, the beginning of my time, anyway), and has been like an old friend – there for me in good times and also bad. Correct me if I’m wrong, but this year just might qualify as “bad,” if you know what I’m sayin’.

I didn’t think there would be baseball this year. Heck, the way things were even a few weeks ago, I was pretty certain there might be no sports at all in 2020.

But lately, there’s been talk of baseball starting back up … and soon.

But wait! Hold on a second there, Spongebob. Now I hear that the MLB owners and the Players Association are talking strike over revenue distribution. The reigning AL Cy Young award winner, Nate Snell, was quoted by the Associated Press as saying, “I’m not splitting no revenue. I want all mine.” This, despite the fact the baseball season will begin with at least some of the games played in empty stadiums, and the owners rely on gate receipts for a large percentage of their revenues.

I can guarantee this to Mr. Snell: If baseball decides to strike this year – of all years – the public relations damage may be irreparable. Even when things get back to “normal” (whatever that may be), folks may decide that if they could live without baseball for a good part of 2020, they can do without it – period. When the owners and players finally patch things up they may find that the stadiums – now ready for eager fans – will remain much like Nate Snell’s head.


Jeff Bing

Lifelong Westlake resident who dabbles in writing whenever the real world permits. My forte is humor and horror...What a combo!

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Volume 12, Issue 10, Posted 10:39 AM, 05.19.2020